Rec: That Explains Much by wanderingsmith

Expendables- Rossmas BannerTitle: That Explains Much
Author: wanderingsmith
Canon: The Expendables
Pairing: Barney Ross/Lee Christmas
Rating: Teen [PG]
Word Count: 2,335
Summary: E3 missing scenes, Team POV of a couple people deep in de Nile.

Recommendation: Okay, once you finish this one you must directly proceed to the sequel It Only Takes a Moment for the resolution. You will not be disappointed. Galgo’s perspective is as hysterical and adorable as he is in the movie.

 

Recommendation #546

Rec: Morons Need Friends by wanderingsmith

Expendables- Rossmas BannerTitle: Morons Need Friends
Author: wanderingsmith
Canon: The Expendables
Pairing: Barney Ross/Lee Christmas
Rating: Teen [PG]
Word Count: 11,089
Summary: “I hate to sound like a chick, but what are you apologizing for?” Frowning to himself, Barney was glad *he* was used to interpreting every inflection of Lee’s voice over radio or while unable to look away from a target. He knew that wasn’t sarcasm. Knew it wasn’t an implication that he didn’t *need* to apologize.

Recommendation: So we start out strong, actual feelings are shared but then we have to go and be guys about it and stop communicating. But thanks to some well-timed eavesdropping, we come to an understanding. Finally.

 

Recommendation #545

Rec: Morning Has Broken by wanderingsmith

Expendables- Rossmas BannerTitle: Morning Has Broken
Author: wanderingsmith
Canon: The Expendables
Pairing: Barney Ross/Lee Christmas
Rating: Explicit [NC-17]
Word Count: 4,090
Summary: “I ever tell you I was married?” Out the corner of his eye, Barney saw Lee’s head jerk toward him in obvious shock, “..No.” Barney never looked away from the TV. “Yeah. For six months. I’ve come to realize, listening to everyone else’s stories, that it was a good marriage. Long time ago. Back when if you liked a woman, you could only end up sleeping together and marrying, in some order or other.” ..nothing but smut here 🙂

Recommendation: Just some smokin’ porn, and no apologies.

 

Recommendation #544

Rec: Blow Me by wanderingsmith

Expendables- Rossmas BannerTitle: Blow Me
Author: wanderingsmith
Canon: The Expendables
Pairing: Barney Ross/Lee Christmas
Rating: Explicit [NC-17]
Word Count: 3,747
Summary: Barney was staring at him steadily, and he distantly wondered if he had the whole time. Stared at him the way Lee’d seen him stare at Gunner a few bad times. Like he heard ticking but couldn’t convince himself it was a bomb that’d blow up in his face.

Recommendation: So, excellent at knives and guns and killing people but really not excellent at things like, you know, feelings or, God forbid, communication. Thankfully they pull it together. And Tool’s cameo at the end, just perfect.

 

Recommendation #543

Rec: Secrets by wanderingsmith

Expendables- Rossmas BannerTitle: Secrets
Author: wanderingsmith
Canon: The Expendables
Pairing: Barney Ross/Lee Christmas
Rating: Teen [PG]
Word Count: 1,979
Summary: “*You’re* the one that went and got married, Lee.”

Recommendation: We need to talk about the rampant machismo in these movies, mostly because they missed the mark on manly hetero and plowed straight on to totally freaking gay. Especially these two in the third movie with Lee really doing an excellent impression of a jealous and insecure girlfriend. Lets just put it this way, he seemed less upset about his girlfriend bailing then Barney kicking him off the team. Lee has his priorities. Barney doesn’t get out of this either Lee is obviously his favorite, everyone seems to catch on to that pretty quick.

 

Recommendation #542